Hey all.
I want to address a topic that is very solemn and hard to discuss but for my own sanity it must be said.
-Deep breaths- The topic is suicide.
Last night my best friend attempted suicide. He texted me and a few other people right before, and had I not thought it weird, he would have died. I live a good distance away from him so I could not go check on him personally. I phoned his partner to go home, and he was found passed out in the bathtub, wrists slit.
If this makes you sick, it should.
We are all numb and dumb-struck. Why didn’t we see the signs sooner? Why didn’t he say something? How could he do this to us?
It’s all a tangled mess of emotions. I am so overloaded by feelings that I don’t feel anything anymore. I feel lost and confused, and my eyes hurt from crying until I can’t cry anymore.
As you are reading this, I want you to ask yourself: Would you wish this on your very best friends? Your closest family?
If the answer is no, then why do you joke about it online?
I have seen it more times than I care to count; internet bullies threatening suicide to get attention. And then there’s always the news stories about the people who actually went through with it, leaving everyone in its wake shocked and dismayed. By acting like that, all you do is take attention away from those who are serious and really need help. You mock their pain and suffering for your inflated ego.
And then there are those, like Sam, who don’t say anything at all. Their pain is hidden deep inside or disguised in other emotions; all of it desperate pleas for help.
So please, next time you decide to pretend to commit suicide, think. Who am I hurting by doing this? Whose real plea will be drowned out because of my phony one? Is this really worth it?
And if you are considering suicide, remember that you can get help and there are people who care about you. Don’t act irrationally. Think of those whose lives will be changed forever without you in it. Even if you feel you can’t talk to anyone, there is at least one person in the world who will listen to you. That person is your lifeline at the Suicide Prevention Hotline. Call anytime, day or night, to talk to someone and they will listen, and they will help. No matter what.
In the US 1-800-273-TALK (8255)
You can also visit the website to learn more about the signs or to find help in your area; Suicide Prevention Lifeline
This stuff is real, guys, and it is no laughing matter.
______________
For the time being I will be semi-hiatus. I will continue to check the blog and play SSO, if only for stress relief. Please be patient if you are waiting for a response from me.
I have a good support network of friends and family. I will be okay.
Please pray for Samuel Byrns and Jacob St. Clare.
Star Stable Online Ride Through 
I don’t get why people commit suicide… I mean, if you are getting bullied or don’t feel good with your life, you should talk to someone who can help you instead of doing something that you will regret. Asking for help before commiting suicide is better. And commiting suicide isn’t the answer at all.
Well, I can tell you why.
My hearts hurts every day. Nothing helps. I have therapy once a week (not in summer). It’s been like this for long time… Still not help.
There’s a reasons why I’m like this.
I’ve thinking suicide almost every day… Still, I’m here.
I just can’t do it to my one and only friend. But I don’t find any other way get rid of this pain.
I’m 21 now and its been like this since I was 13. So I know what I’m talking about.
Okay, but suicide still isn’t right. Everyone has a family who loves you, everyone has friends who love you, not everyone loves you, but alot of people do, so suicide isn never the answer, even if it seems like it.
The thing is, when you are feeling the way people feel when they are on the brink of suicide, it seems like nothing will ever change, and like there is nothing anything can do to help you, and like death is the only solution. I know to an outsider (someone that has been lucky enough to have to experience the thought of committing suicide, and has not had anyone they love attempt or succeed in it) the though of feeling like this is absurd. When you feel this way, a lot of the time it does not seem like there is anyone in your life that loves you. It seems like there is no escape, no treatment, no other answer. Other times, these things don’t matter to the victim. They do not think of those people. They just want an easy way out of all the pain and suffering.
In short, I know that to someone who has never had experience with suicide, it seems abstract and strange and foolish, but to someone who has suffered from these feelings, there is a whole realm of reasons and justifications to it. I don’t mean to be rude, but posting comments like this sort of feels like invalidation of these thoughts and feelings, and may be offensive and hurtful. Please, think and open your mind a bit to understand these things before posting. Thank you, and I hope this made sense.
How was I offensive? I was commenting on Maggie’s post explaining how I see it, I see it in the way that one shouldn’t commit suicide because of a bully. Please explain how that would have been hurtful, and what else do I have to understand before posting my OPINION. And no, yours made no sense (OPINION, FYI) so I have no idea what I would say when you reply next time to me.
Well, people use suicide as an escape. As a break from the pain. And I’m not trying to be rude, but if you’re not depressed or suicidal or have someone or know someone who is, then you don’t really get it. Trust me on this one.
Suicicide as an escape? Suicicide is like wasting all those years you would have left. It is painful enough to commit suicicide. Cutting yourself is painful. Plus, you can’t say I know nothing about it if I don’t have anybody who I know that feels that way. But I have been sad, so then I do get it. And no, I do not trust you on this, because I don’t have to if I don’t want to. And don’t tell me it is right to do, because it is the worst thing you could ever do, and it is completely wrong to do it.
Tiffany, I don’t know if you will ever read this, but here is what I have to say:
Being sad and being at the point of committing suicide are two very, very, VERY different things. We’ve all been sad, yet the fact that you even said you don’t understand why people do it means you don’t understand. Don’t you see? There has to be something VERY wrong in that person’s life that is causing them immeasurable pain for suicide to be an option. Yes, it’s wrong to commit suicide. But some people are in so much pain that they can’t even think straight. You said we all have people who love us, but that’s not entirely true. For my friend Alex, it is, but to him, it doesn’t feel that way. Only me and his other few friends love him. His family wants nothing to do with him. He gets beaten by his parents. He has a lot going on in his life that a 14 year old kid shouldn’t. So your comment was somewhat hurtful, even to me, and I’ve never even tried to commit suicide. But please try to understand that some people have people in their lives who have committed or tried to commit suicide and that it is a very sensitive subject. To say it is stupid or there is no reason for it can hurt people. So please, try to understand. If you don’t want to, that’s ok, too, but please try to be more careful about what you post. I know you didn’t mean it to be hurtful, and it’s ok, because you’re right: it’s not the answer, and it should give you that reaction where you want to speak out against it. It SHOULD disturb you and make you question why someone would do it. But how you feel about something can be very different from how someone else feels. Just be more careful in the future.
***This post is dedicated to Alex, the best friend I could ever have***
Some people commit suicide because they don’t feel secure or confident enough to talk. I still don’t see why they do it either though.
I know the reason that makes them do it, I have been there, what I mean is that I don’t get why they end up doing it even after people try to convince them not to, even if it ends the suffering for them it makes their friends and family suffer instead
I agree with Tiffany and Maggie. I am so sorry Maggie. Taking away your own life because of anything, sadness or bulling, anything, suicide is not the response. I will pray for Sam and Jacob. I am really sorry Maggie, I will reblog this for you.
O_O OMG Maggie I am so sorry to hear that! That is horrible! Things will get better. Just be positive, and remember-if you feel depressed because of this, you can always talk to not only your real family and friends, but also us! I will pray for them. I am so SO SO SO SO sorry to hear that!!
Reblogged this on Jorvik Rider and commented:
Suicide is not the answer. I am really sorry Maggie.
I am Autumn ( sorry I keep making mistakes like that )
Being suicidal myself, I can understand how it feels to see suicide jokes online. It hurts, as if they WANTED me to kill myself. Whenever I draw things such as life lines, knives (which are included in some of my pictures), I’m considered “emo” and people simply tell me “Don’t cut yourself,” while they smile. People don’t understand what a serious topic this is, and casually toss around words. It needs to stop, and people need to learn what effect they are really having.
Thanks for the support and please do spread the word.
As far as Sam is concerned, he has struggled with severe depression most of his life (and he’s probably developed some other conditions as well). While bullying is a problem, there are other issues that may drive someone to suicide. Regardless of the cause it is important for everyone to know the signs and get help for friends or family who may be struggling.
I hope you don’t mind but I shared this on my facebook page, I have a few friends who are suicidal.
No problem, that is why I posted it. I hope it can help more people.
Reblogged this on Tiffany Goldpaw and commented:
This post was made by Maggie Oldcamp.
I actually think there is no real need to suicide, and it is not any kind of answer at all. Sorting things out, or at least trying, is better than commiting suicide. I have a lot of problems myself, but I am going to try and sort them out or just leave them bullies sitting there and give them no attention so they can find someone else. So, before you commit suicide, think about it. There are people who love you, who need you. There are people who can help you, or at least try. Even if you can’t fix the problem, go somewhere where people love you and where you have friends. Is the problem at school? Change schools. Is your relative the problem? Don’t speak with each other or do anything at all with each other. Is your friend the problem? Leave him/her there and forget that friend. Is the problem at many places? Try to sort it out. If you think you need a rest, go on a small vacation to forget about it. They will have some time to think as well! If it’s an internet bully or meanie, ignore/block them on that site where you are bullied.
I hope that any of you with problems will remember to not commit suicide. Instead, sort things out first, at least try!
I am really sorry Maggie. I am going to REBLOG this again..
And I can’t.
I agree with you Maggie, suicide needs to stop, it’s not really necessary’ if you even think about committing suicide, you should get help. I’m also terribly sorry Maggie, I will pray for them.
My prayers go out to you, your friends, and your community. Good on you for staying strong, especially when your friend seems to need support more now than ever. Lots of love!
I’m sorry to hear about that, and i know what you are going through my best friend committed suicide 2 months ago and i’m going through so many emotions and even thought about suicide myself cause i thought about not living if she wasn’t there but I’m not (therapy helped with it)
P.S. I’ve been dealing with SH for a year now
P.S.S. SH is Self-Harm
I am so sorry for you and your friend regarding this traumatic situation. I have been diagnosed with clinical depression and a variety of other mental health disorders throughout the previous seven years of my life. I encounter difficulties everyday pertaining to other people, as I have been bullied in elementary and middle school by careless, self-indulgent individuals who take pride in my misery and pain. It appears conspicuous to me that those people who inflict this pain are oblivious and apathetic people who have no idea what it feels like to be in my situation, insulted EVERYDAY, directly or indirectly, accumulating all of this inside until I am a water balloon filled beyond capacity and burst, because I cannot take this anymore. I have always been different from others, and this trend is most likely to continue for the entire duration of my life. I put on a facade, concealing all of the pain and malaise I feel around people, but inside I am a collapsing building. I attempted suicide myself last year in sixth grade, due to all of the internal conflict from school. Now, I remind myself that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Maybe you can persuade your friend and remind him about this, as he would lose so many people who truly care for him. I hope this helps.
Reblogged this on mystarstableblog and commented:
Suicide is never the answer. As someone who has attempted suicide before, I agree 100% with this post, and I hate it when I see people threatening to kill their selves on star stable and real life, for some silly reason like someone has a different opinion or they had a silly argument over something really small, when there are people who are actually considering suicide, because of abuse, bullying, depression etc.
im sososososososo sorry! i dont know how it feels but i KNOW it was prolly AWFUL! #TooMuchToLiveFor 😦
Maggie…I had no idea. I’m so sorry I just saw this now…. You and your friends will be in my prayers. ❤
To be honest, I’ve considered suicide due to bullying at school for my looks and basically everything about me. However, I too have a friend, Alex, who has attempted suicide twice. He has depression and doesn’t get attention at home, and it’s really sad to see. When I realized how much worse he had it and how nice my life really was, I didn’t want to die. After all, at least I had family. Alex didn’t.
We’re inseparable now, and he comes over whenever he’s depressed to just be around people who care about him.
I know how you feel, Maggie, even though Alex had attempted before I met him. I am really sorry, and know this is coming from someone who really knows what you’re going through, not just someone giving empty apologies.
❤ Lizbeth ❤
Thanks, that means a lot to me. He is really happy lately. Also I got him addicted to SSO so whenever he has a bad day, Jake tells him to go play with his ponies and they’ll make him happy. Seriously though, he has ALL the ponies in the game, lol!
LOL!
I actually came back to this page to post some sad news.
My friend I previously posted about, Alex, has now committed his third attempt at suicide. I was texting him, and he started to tell me he was holding a knife, and I was so scared. I ran and told my parents right away, and I kept texting him to wait, don’t do anything, and tell me why he wanted this while my parents dialed 911. Neither of his parents were home and they found him on his bed, knife in one hand, phone in the other. They say I saved him, but really, I didn’t…I just postponed the attempt that would actually kill him.
Alex is one of my best friends, and I love him so much. He’s like a brother to me. Please keep him in your prayers. Thank you. >.<
Happy 4th of July…!
I just reread your story, Maggie, and I realized how similar they are… Weird how they both texted before. And just so you all know, Alex never really cut himself. He was just working up the nerve to. >.<
I’m so sorry Maggie, I will reblog this. So so sorry you went through this.
Reblogged this on horseisle2ridethrough and commented:
Hey everyone, just want you all to know-suicide is not the answer. There are people out there that love you. And you can always get help, call the suicide hotline if you have these thoughts or actions.
Love yall!
Last year December 15-20th 2014 everyone at my school (that had an instagram or a facebook, or social media account) did #thelinesproject where you do the sharpie colors on your right arm if your supporting the cause and left if your in depression the colors stand for reasons someone might want to commit suicide such as bullying, harm and such it was an amazing turnout me and my best friend Moeira did it and btw I didn’t make it up she posted it on instagram and I reposted and we did it and it was amazing to know no one in my class was having suicidal thoughts and I think Liz your right about the whole long comment you posted and I read and I hope things get better with your friend Liz
Reading this post has helped me quite a lot actually. I lost a friend to suicide when I was on holiday in August, I had no internet for two weeks and when my friend texted me about what had happened, I blamed myself for not being able to help. However, that, this post, and a few, really important friends helped me realise that people loved me and that’s helped me realise that suicide and self harming isn’t the answer
Honestly, I’ve wanted to die. I’ve tried holding a knife over my neck, smelling bleach, and other things. People don’t take me seriously and I just want to get out of this place. I don’t know why I’m still alive, and everyone keeps telling me I just want attention and want to cause drama when I share my true feelings. Don’t people always say to share you feelings? Well IT ISN’T HELPING. I’m crying right now, my dad is so bad but good and idk what is life anymore i want to die i cant contril my emotions im cryung rihgt now and everyone thinks im lying about how i feel which you probbaly are thinking that while readfing this
You definitely should get help. Speak to a school counselor or a resource at your local community and family center. There are also anonymous help lines you can call to speak to someone. Your feelings do matter, and there is always someone who will listen to you. Also don’t be above speaking to your doctor, mental disorders are just as much a physical issue as any other part of your body. Seek treatment, your doctor can help. Just as much as you wouldn’t ignore a sore back or tummy troubles, don’t ignore problems in your head. Your health is your responsibility. There are always people who can help you.
I feel so bad for you. Please don’t kill yourself, I have thought about it too and when I seen the look in my moms eyes when I slit my wrists once I knew that I was never going to do it again. If you died your dad would be devastated and so would I and the rest of your family. I take you very seriously because I can relate and I have a friend who was going to commit suicide. I talked him out of it. Please don’t do it.
I have felt depressed before because of family problems which are still ongoing, but I am happier now. I have such amazing friends who make life so much enjoyable and make me want to live longer. Sometimes I wonder would people really miss me or not if I ever killed myself, but as the years go by I think more and more that they would. I hope no one will ever try to harm themselves out of depression. I know life can be hard and sometimes you wish you never even existed or that you could just be taken away from all the hardships and confusion of life with seemingly everyone yelling at each other and everything too confusing and fast forward, if that made
any sense. Like, when it seems like the only safe spot in the world, is to lock yourself in the bathroom or hide under your covers of your bed in your bedroom with the door shut, without being tormented with the struggles of life. I’m sure everyone has had one of those days when everything goes wrong and in the end of it all your seemingly only option is to run to your bedroom and slam the door shut to sob in silence. But life is better than sitting in your bedroom alone crying with the door shut. I know life can be so hard, with people around you screaming or yelling at each other and your stuck in the middle of it and all you want to do is curl up in a ball and put your hands over your ears and try to make yourself invisible in case you make it worse. Buttttt, life can be better than that! You need to tackle life head on and get through those tough times! Sometimes you fall, but you need to have the courage to get back up and carry on! Sometimes if people are trying to explain something that’s embarrassing and really humiliating to you, sometimes you need to just accept it all and not run away, since running away will probably make it seem like it’ll make it worse for yourself, and possibly anyone/everyone else. You need to be strong. I hope my comment helped people who read the story and the comments. 🙂 Thanks.
Soz when I said: Sometimes I wonder would people really miss me or not if I ever killed myself, but as the years go by I think more and more that they would.
What I meant to say is: Sometimes I wonder would people really miss me or not if I ever killed myself, but as the years go by I think more and more that they wouldn’t.